Exploding Snails

serves them right for eating something so gross in the first place
These two idiots in California are suing the Seafood Peddler restaurant in San Rafael over an alleged incident of "exploding" escargot.

Chadwick St.-OHarra and Steve Righetti were celebrating Righetti's birthday at the restaurant and they both ordered the escargot.

As they dove into the little devils with their cocktail forks the snails squirt out hot garlic butter on both of their faces and polo shirts. St-OHarra cried that butter got into one of his tear ducts causing 'temporary vision impairment' and said he was genuinely outraged about the incident.

Maybe he should have sued his mother for naming him Chadwick, a name like that is just asking for trouble. And have you ever been outside when a tiny little bug flies into your eye. It hurts like Hell, but you don't see me suing God do you? Like God should have warned me that little bugs can be hazardous to my eyes, causing 'temporary vision impairment'.

The birthday boy was humiliated when the butter squirted him on the side of the nose. Righetti, who owns a nearby auto shop asked, "Do I need this on my birthday?" Well maybe not but I'm sure he's been squirted with a lot worse by working in an auto shop.

They claimed that the only reason they are suing is because the restaurant didn't display sufficient remorse. Remorse? For something they could not control? "It was the indifference," St-OHarra said, "It was the friggin' rudeness." I suspect it was the Friggin' Rudeness of the birthday boy and his friend that caused the restaurant to not give a Shit.

I would be curious to know if any girlfriend or wives were at this dinner too. 'Cause I guarantee that this would not be an up coming issue in court. A wife would not let her idiot husband make a bigger idiot of himself in front of a judge. Or maybe she should.


Grumpy said…
First of all, escargot are not gross; I love them. Secondly, these two are idiots. What a waste of the legal systems resources.
fernvalley01 said…
You have got to be kidding! they are suing because they are too stupid to slow down and let the meal cool a moment before jamming a fork into a hot butter ? can I sue them because they are now making my head hurt?
kden said…
Well at least you agree with me on one point Grumpy. That's a good day in my book.
D. Duplessis said…
Are they related to the lady who sued McDonald's over the hot coffee incident?
Claire King said…
And then we wonder why our legal system is bogged down and backed up? These dudes need to grow up.
Signe said…
I hope the snails band together next time and give him diarrhea.

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