Roomie Change

The Winter quarter at Eastern had only finished the first full week. We took the kid back Sunday afternoon and her roommate was there watching Netflix movies but we didn't go up. K then left the room about 5:30 pm. The next morning the kid thought it was strange that her roommate hadn't come home, but then she checked her messages. Late Sunday night she had received a message from her roommate's twin sister after she had already turned her phone off, who said that her sister tried to kill herself that night.

Apparently she drove herself to a service station in the small college town, slit her wrists and took 30 Benadryl. Someone had found her and called 911. Later on Monday, another message arrived from K herself saying that she would be spending a few nights in the hospital then going into treatment.

Our daughter knew that in the past she had eating disorder issues, and had recently broken up with a girlfriend. Her parents were also very overprotective of her, especially her Mother. Maybe college life was just too much pressure for her, who knows.

Her Mom came Monday to get some things thinking she would be back in the Spring. Her Dad came the next night to get more things, then the Mom again. But now they realized that if she's not going to school at the time, she needs to have everything out. So the Friday before the long MLK weekend, K and her Mom came to get everything out. The kid said that K actually looked happy. But I thought it was odd that she wasn't in treatment like she said she was going to be.

After another weekend home we took our daughter back Monday evening, grabbed some dinner and ate it in her room. It did feel strange to have the other half totally empty. The kid does kind of prefer to have the room to herself, but not this way. I wouldn't say they were close, but they did get along, which in college life says a lot.

The week after the 3-day holiday is an open week to change rooms/dorms for whatever reason. So if a person wants to go into a different dorm or floor they are notified of what's available. The entire week she waited for an email saying she will be having a new roommate but it never came. So for the remainder of this quarter she will have the whole dorm room to herself. Since her dorm is specialized (Living Learning Community) and she is on the Arts floor it's very possible she will be alone for the rest of the school year because anyone coming in will have to be majoring (or thinking about it) in the Arts field. Again, she kind of prefers to be alone but I would like to see her with someone who likes to get out a bit and have some fun. I feel bad that she gets done with her classes and just does homework and watches Netflix. She even eats dinner in her room :-(

But now I'm starting to think...what if K comes back next quarter and her old room is available with my daughter? Will the kid feel like she has to keep an eye on her? She had no idea of what K was going through so will she have to be extra vigilant? That would be an awful lot of pressure if you ask me. What if she had done that in the bathroom or even her room for a fellow student/roommate to find? I do feel bad for her family and I wish her nothing but the best but when I sent my girl off to college, this is not the kind of education I was thinking of for her.


Grumpy said…
Having a room to yourself would be cool, but she needs to socialize also. That's a big part of the college experience.

I wouldn't want the pressure of having a roommate who I felt I needed to watch over. I think it better she gets someone new before that happens.
Mr. Shife said…
Sorry your daughter had to experience all of that. Glad she is doing okay with the whole situation. Personally I would enjoy the roommate-less situation but that's because I'm an introvert and need my alone time from the world. It will all work out for the best for her. Take care, kden. Are you guys getting snowed dumped on you too? Having a mini-blizzard here in Boise.
Claire M. King said…
Sorry about her situation. I am glad she's is ok and I hope the kid hangs in there. I also hope she doesn't get too isolated without having a roomie. Remind her to look for activities once in a while to break up the study monotony. Great friends are forged in college and this isolation bit is a drag. I know...I am going through it right now.

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