Back On The Wagon

I really hate admitting this but I am a stress eater. It's gotten me in trouble for many years, but I've just been more aware of it recently. I guess that's a good thing--to be aware. But the fact that I am a stress eater, has me gained back 14 lbs of the 60 I had lost.

That makes me depressed which makes me want to do what??? EAT! Such a terrible cycle I got into. I have no excuses but only reasons that triggered it for me.

First, my trip to Alaska last October. In so looking forward to it, it was such a letdown and stayed with me for a long time. I just didn't care about much of anything and it was downhill from there. Then came the stress of having a Senior; culminating project, college apps, financial aid forms, and so many choices and decisions to make. Without hubby's help it weighed on my shoulders alone. To add to the mix my Mom got sick and My Lady's husband died. It was just all too much at once. I ate my way to the bottom of the potato chip bag. I still ate good meals but started eating too many carbs and never said no to a meal out. The kid who used to be very picky about where and what she ate, is now interested in trying new restaurants. Nice timing child of mine.

But I'm tired of how I feel. My feet hurt, my back hurts, my knee hurts more in Zumba and I don't move as swiftly in class either. I feel clumsy. I used to have a spring in my step when I walk, now I clunk along.

I didn't want to be that person; the one that loses a bunch of weight then gains it all back, plus more. My family (mostly brothers) was proud of me for the first time in my life, I can't go back to feeling humiliated in their presence. All of my larger clothes are gone. I'm not buying bigger clothes, I refuse.

So it's time to get back on the wagon. My life has smoothed out a bit and it's time to take control again. I don't have expectations to be stick thin, I never have. I just want to feel and look better, if only for myself. I've already lost 3 lbs. so I guess I'm on my way back down.......again.

Comments

Grumpy said…
It's all mind over matter. You want to do it, you did it before, you can do it again.

Just picture yourself as the hot mom when you move your daughter into the dorms in the fall.
kden said…
I agree with your first sentence and I finally got my head back in the game. Not so sure about the next sentence though, ha. I probably have 10 years on all the other Moms.
You can do it kden because you want to do it.
bill said…
I don't know the answer, Ms Kaden. I've got a weight problem myself. I think It's a mental game but I haven't mastered it yet. Good luck.
Anonymous said…
I know you can do it - I have faith in you. Good luck & hang in there.
Claire M. King said…
We all have bad habits that require discipline to break. I know I have a few and if you did once, you will do it again.
Mr. Shife said…
Well the first step is acknowledging it and you have done that. And you already started losing weight so that is awesome. Keep it up kden and you will be right back where you want to be. Don't beat yourself up so much and keep fighting the good fight.

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