Bad Ass Housewives

I see my city has made the national news.....again. My fair city has been linked with such stories regarding police brutality, record snowfall, serial killers, and famous people that were born here.

But yesterday I knew we had hit the big time when Good Morning America reported on the local housewives that are going out of state to......SMUGGLE DISHWASHER DETERGENT.

Yep, that's right. We've got a bunch of Bad Ass Housewives that are sneaking across the border to buy their illegal goods. Due to the high levels of phosphates in our rivers and lakes, our county banned the use of phosphate based dishwasher detergent last year. But the stuff works so crappy that people would rather brazenly cross the border to smuggle soap than go without clean dishes. These women are not afraid of being caught and use their real names when being interviewed. Patti said than when friends know she's going for a run across the border, they ask her if she can pick them up "some of the good stuff." Husbands are even being forced by their wives to make the drive themselves to do their dastardly deeds.

I don't use my dishwasher because I have an older, used Italian model (hubby) that works better. But I have seen the results of what the 'green' detergent offers, and it's not much. Silverware is the worst with it's white film and there is no squeaky-clean feeling on anything. People are washing their dishes twice just to get them clean or pre-washing to the point of why bother with the dishwasher at all.

Even if I had a nice dishwasher that I would like to use often I'm not sure I would want to become a smuggler myself. It just sound too dangerous. If they would decide to put up a checkpoint at the border my guilty face would say it all; that I had illegal contraband in my vehicle. And those soap sniffing dogs would scare me to death and I would surely start crying "OK, you got me, I did it."

But...I might consider making a deal in a dark alley with a known 'soapy' if I needed the stuff bad enough.


Signe said…
Wow....those are some hard criminals there! *rolly-eyes at dumb women*

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