Why Is A Good Night Sleep So Elusive To Me?
I am so jealous of people that can fall asleep quickly and stay asleep the entire night.
I go to bed at 10:00; that's is my limit for staying up, no matter what night it is. Most times I can fall asleep rather quickly but I wake up often during the night. Occasionally I hear my husband come in at 2:00 (from work, not the bar). And sometimes I wake up to use the bathroom. But if I wake up within an hour or so of my alarm going off (5:20) then I can't fall back asleep. So there are many days that I'm awake at 4:00am and my butt drags all day.
You'd think it would be better on the weekends but for some reason it's not. This morning I woke up at 4:30, went to the bathroom and there I am wide awake on a Sunday morning. I finally got up at 6:00 and no one else is going to be up until at least 8:30 or so and the paper's not here yet. What kind of a paperboy can't get the paper to your doorstep by 6:00? Maybe I should get a paper route since I have nothing else to do that time of the day. I'm not even a morning person, I hate getting up early, so why can't I sleep?
I have a mind that won't turn off once it's revved up. It doesn't even have to be about anything important. Once it starts it's like a little exercise wheel with a hyper gerbil in it; spinning round and round.
That's why I can't meditate, my mind won't shut up.
There are also times if I'm very stressed that I don't fall asleep at all. I hate those times. I just know when I go to bed that it's going to be a rough one. So don't give me any bad news around bedtime or I'll be awake all night. Then trying to function the next day is the worst.
I used to get up and read, listen to music, or jump on the internet but I don't even want to do that anymore because it still doesn't do any good.
I wish I could just lie down and become unconscious until my alarm goes off. Most people want to win the lottery but I just want one good nights sleep.
Well, winning the lottery WOULD be nice.